And More Tales From the Bed

I am beginning to think that I should have put these into “In the Shadow of Death: Reflections on a Chronic Illness.” When I first published it in 2011. My only excuse is that the Tales from the Bed were extremely personal at the time. This is the first time I have shared with readers other than family these reports. The first group of reports are here and the second group are here.

Laughter is the Best Medicine

In a rare moment of reflection, this reporter admits to a small unhappiness at her condition, but her husband has found the solution – a portable DVD player and comedies.

This reporter has laughed her way through the movies Airplane, Addams Family Values, Shreik, Blazing Saddles and the TV series Benny Hill. Her roommate, who only understands German laughed with her.

Do you know how hard it is to explain American jokes to a German in German?

Signing off From the Edge of the Bed

Stairs

Intrepid is the best word to describe this reporter as she braved the dangers of climbing up and down stairs. Of course, she had a safety net by the name of Kirsten. Kirsten is in her last year of physical therapy school and works with patients like this reporter.

However great the danger, this reporter is willing to bring you the latest great hospital adventure. What’s next? Maybe the proper use of the bed-pan?

Signing off From the Edge of the Bed

Watering Hole

Every evening about 7 P.M., the long-term residents of the Nephrology ward gather to discuss their daily treatment. This reporter has received advise on visualization techniques, eating habits, and long-term care of the kidneys – all in the German language, of course.

Might this reporter add that she is starting to gain some converstional expertise?

Signing off From the Edge of the Bed

Urine Collection

As a long term patient of this facility, your fearless reporter has responsibilities and duties. One of these duties is urine collection. She is required to capture this liquid in a large pitcher, which is marked in milli-liters. She even has a locker with her name prominently displayed on the outside.

So what does she collect in a day? About 1 liter to 1500 milli-liters. Translation: around 1 1/2 quarts.

Signing off From the Edge of the Bed

This is the Real CYN

Escaping prisoner climbs from the bed, escapes to the Subaru, and spends a few hours nach Hause (at home). Yes folks, I have been let out of the cage for a few hours on my honor if I come back before bedcheck.

AND… where are the thoughts and responses of my readers???   Do I have readers?

Signing off from the edge of the Bed

4 thoughts on “And More Tales From the Bed

  1. Bizarrely funny!

    And there’s a lot cross culturally that an American would get that a German wouldn’t, and vice versa.

    I imagine you’re far enough away in time now that it’s easier to post these now than to publish then.

  2. Pingback: Tales of the Bed Again | Cyn Bagley - Poet and Writer

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