If. It’s one of the saddest two-letter words in the world. I am so grateful that I had so many years with my capricious elf.
Today would have been our twenty-third anniversary. As was our custom we would have had dinner together.
He brought so much life and love into my heart. I miss him every day. There are days when I hope to see him again.
Not now and not yet– I did promise that I would live and write. To that end I brought Foxy, a chihuahua-terrier mix, into my life. She keeps me on track.
So this afternoon, my brother and I are going to lunch, and we’ll talk about Otto and how much we miss him. Then we will laugh at a few of his jokes. Can I tell you a secret? His life was no easier than mine. But, he knew how to dwell on the good and let the negative go. I keep remembering when he told me to hold onto our memories because they would never come again.
So I miss him deeply. I really miss how he could make me laugh even when I was in my crankiest moods.
He used to say, “I don’t wake up cranky. I just let her sleep.”
It still makes me laugh.