The New and Improved Workforce
The cubicles about three feet by three feet were laid out in rows as far as the eyes could see. In each cubicle there was a phone, a price sheet, and a chair. The cubicles were painted white and there were no pictures or personal items in any of the cubes.
Seated on the chairs there were men, and women. Each of them were dialing phones, and in various tones, were asking if the person on the other end would like to go on a cruise, win a prize, or some other fantastical purchase that would be much cheaper than if they bought it in a store.
The CEO looked proudly down on his new marketing center. His Chief of Personnel was explaining how they had come up with this solution in a down economy. “Our research and development team found a zombie virus and decided to experiment with the work force.”
The CEO watched live humans with carts, throwing what looked like meat into the cubicles. A zombie snapped at the meat and tried to pull its chair to the live human. He noticed that there were iron manacles chaining the zombies’ feet to the floor.
“We have a few problems,” said the CEP. “If the zombies are not chained down, they will attack our non-infected humans. And, they won’t eat anything but human brains.”
“Where do you get the brains?” asked the CEO.
“The prisons are too full now,” said the CEP. “The guards are trying to get the prisoners off their hands. No one is surprised when child molester or rapist gets killed in prison.”
The CEO shook his head. “How do you get people to volunteer for this project?” The CEO had a handful of papers with the former humans’ signatures. It would have been legal nightmare without the papers.
“We just told them that to get the job, they would have to be vaccinated. We did lose a few who read the the fine print.” The CEP smiled, “but most of them just signed it.”
The zombies could work longer without rest than normal humans. Besides there were more people clamoring for work. They would never run out of a workforce. And, the profits would increase. The CEO turned away from the window. It was time to go to the next factory for the next inspection.
By Cyn Bagley from “Smoke & Mirrors”
Here is an ear worm for you on Halloween:
The Monster Mash